Hello friends! Today in this ‘In the Bloglight’ post, I’m sharing some info about myself and my blog so that you can get to know me better…. and why I started my blog Setting for Four!
So welcome to Setting for Four everyone!!
In the Bloglight – Here’s a bit about me, my background and my blog:
I started blogging December 31st 2010….December 31st…Yes, I’m not kidding, the last day of the year!
Why that day? I was feeling that I absolutely had to start something new in my life at the close of that year.
Frankly, 2010 was a year of not-so-great surprises for me, disorder and frustration.
I had moved to a new city where I had no family and didn’t know a soul, with my military hubby and two sons.
This particular posting followed several years of my husband’s extended deployments overseas, several family separations and to be honest several months of loneliness.
This was a posting that was supposed to be more stable, more quality family time, more ‘regularity’ (if there even is such a thing with the military lifestyle!)…but it turned out to be the opposite.
We thought we would be golfing together, hanging out with new friends, doing lots of antiquing and day trips (which we love!).
But what actually happened is that two weeks after arriving at our new posting, my husband left for an overseas training exercise and was away each and every month for 10 months every year!
He was traveling throughout the continental US, to Korea, to Africa, to Singapore, Afghanistan and Thailand ….he was traveling everywhere across the globe, except home!
And while he was ‘going everywhere’, I felt that I was ‘going nowhere’ so to speak, stuck in a stressful and challenging situation alone with two children and not moving forward.
Hubby was only home December and January in 2010 and 2011 and gone every February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October and November!
It was challenging for him too: he was either jet lagged or away from his family.
By December 2010 I knew I needed to do something that I could control in a situation that I had no control over.
Creating My Website Setting for Four and Starting my Blog
I thought maybe, since I loved reading blogs, I could start my own blog, maybe I could learn something new and challenging, maybe I could meet some friends in the blogosphere that had the same interests and passion for home, family, DIY’ing and decorating as me!
Casual Glam Family Room Decor Ideas:
And that is how Setting for Four was ‘born’.
It was a chance to save my sanity in a very crazy situation that I was in…and it did!
I have not only learned a lot of technical things like HTML, coding, blog design and photo editing, I have been fortunate enough to have made some fantastic blogy friends along the way!
How To Start A Blog & Blogging Tips
Where Does My Website Name Originate From?
So how did I come up with my blog name “Setting for Four”??
The name came from from those extended and frequent separations that we were experiencing as a family.
I would always set our kitchen table with 4 place settings during meals, even when my husband was away.
It made us all feel like he was still at home ‘in spirit’, part of our family meals, part of our lives, even when he physically wasn’t.
It gave, I hope, our two boys a sense that even though Dad was away, they could be comforted by knowing his spot was still at the head of the table, his ‘spot’ in their lives, as their Dad, was still there.
So out of a situation of difficulty and challenge, Setting for Four turned into a journey of joy, fun and great personal reward.
How I Learned To Blog
I started blogging very slowly with baby steps, with no clue really how to write to an audience, or how to take great pictures…
My New Office Chair Reveal (um, see what I mean by starting with baby steps??) and I went crazy when I received my first comment!


My posts were sooooo boring to read! Really!
I had to loosen up and write for fun, write like I chat over coffee with a girlfriend.
And slowly I learned how.
How did I learn to do that? By reading lots of blogs and just by writing posts, making mistakes and writing some more!
How To Start A Blog & Blogging Tips
The Joy and Freedom of Blogging
Blogging changed me by bringing me confidence in a time I felt uncertain about my life and gave me a satisfying degree of control at a time when I felt I had no control.
It has more importantly changed me in that I have so many wonderful new friends now.
Blog friends I have never met face-to-face but know better than some of my real life friends.
Blogging has allowed me to join a super supportive community during a time I had no support in a new city with no friends or family nearby.
And by joining that supportive community it made me feel uplifted and that finally I found ‘my people’….people who ‘got’ me, who loved to decorate and DIY just as much as me!
So where do I get my blogging and decorating inspiration from?
My favorite design and DIY websites are Better Homes and Gardens, Houzz, (I’m fortunate to write for both of these online websites!), Pinterest, Decorpad and HGTV.
A Passion For Design
As an Interior designer I love to help people with their design dilemmas.
I love to bring beauty and comfort to a space, find that perfect wall color, make it a home for the owner and their family…like I did for Meg.
Here I helped her choose a new wall color for her kitchen after she had painted her kitchen island a beautiful grey color.
I suggested Benjamin Moore Wythe Blue to coordinate with her white cabinetry, grey island, sand color countertops and beige flooring!
She completely loves this wall color, you can see the changes here:
Before (green wall color):

Here Are Some of my Reader’s Favorite Decor and DIY Posts:


I’d love to hear from you!
If you have a question… or just want to say ‘hi’ you can shoot me an email at [email protected]!
Heather
Awww….the story brings me to tears….because I’ve been in your shoes for the whole military part. I think you are fantastic! So glad that you’re featured in the Bloglight! Woohoo!
–Katie
Oh Katie!! Don’t you cry or I will start too! I think you are fantastic too, you are such a special lady!!! Thanks for the sweet words, its comforting to know that you know exactly what I am talking about, ‘been there, done that!’
Heather, it’s so nice to read this post, hear your story, and get to know YOU better. In the process of reading this I have felt encouraged to continue with my little blog and to not feel obligated to be posting everyday (and not feel guilty that I don’t).
You are such a beautiful woman and have a beautiful blog to top it off! I’m so happy to be a “follower”.
Have a wonderful week and congratulations on being featured!!! You deserve it.
Rhiannon
Wow, thanks so much Rhiannon for your sweet comments! Glad that you enjoyed my post! And everyone’s blog starts out as ‘their little blog’, so rest assured that it can grow as big or fast (or not!) as you want!! Thanks for following me, that means so much!! And I am totally blushing here with the ‘beautiful woman’ comment!!! That is such a fantastic compliment! You have a great week as well and have fun with your blog!
Sweet post! Hopefully all of us crazy bloggers keep you entertained when hubby is deployed.
Have a great night!
xox
Oh yes, Anne you keep me entertained!!! Thanks for the lovely comment!
Hi Heather!
Just like discovering how a book got its title, I always like to learn how a blog got its name/how it came to be. I’m so glad that your blog provided you with a creative outlet when so many other variables were out of your control. I’m not as hard-core about blogging now as when I first started, but it definitely helped me be more productive during the lulls of supply teaching last year (and enabled me to meet some amazing people!).
You always come up with such lovely projects.
I hope that your move has brought some positive changes to your husband’s work schedule so that you can enjoy more time together.
Take care! 🙂
Claire thanks for the sweet comments, you are such a lovely person! I love your blog too and its interesting how we blog to be productive like you said! Thank you for the congrats on my feature! Hubs has a brand new job (never existed before) in a brand new group (that never existed before) so that kind of makes me nervous since it all needs to be ‘flushed out’ yet….but he definitely has been home more which has been AWESOME!!
Heather, I loved your post and was touched by your story. Thank you so much for sharing this. You’ve inspired me.
Thanks for the comments here. If my voice in this post can help anyone out that is feeling uncertain about things in their life, then that is simply fantastic! Sometimes you have to fall before you can fly!
Love the story Heather!! And you…you are a doll! So glad to know you!
Janel: you are a doll as well…sooooooo glad to have met you through blogging girlie!!! Thanks for your sweet comments here! You are always so quick to help me and have the most humororous and fun attitude and spirit!! All while juggling everything you do! Knuckle-bumps!!
I can’t thank you enough for suggesting the Wythe blue paint for my kitchen! It’s showing up in just about every space in my home now. LOVE it! We love YOU too!!
XOXO
Meg!! I saw you added it to some doors too….your home is looking so Better Homes and Gardens girl!! So glad that color turned out to work in your spaces!! Sometimes all a person needs is another viewpoint!
What a fabulous post, Heather! I love hearing about why you started blogging…it’s sort of the same for me…I just needed something for myself. I’m so glad we met months ago. You are truly a great friend, and no-one is more deserving! Love ya girl!
Jess
Jessica, dedicating our lives to family, hubbies, kiddos and running our home and nest is so amazing and rewarding, but sometimes we need a little something for ourselves! So glad you were able to find that too! I am sooo glad we met too! I clearly remember the first time I visited your blog and saw your gorgeous craft room space! Then I discovered that the girl sitting in that craft room was a gorgeous friend too!
Heather, this was such a wonderful writeup! I really felt I got a chance to have a cup of coffee with you and gab. Guess what? You’re over your technical writing.. you’ve achieved your goal! 🙂
And I get what blogging does in times of absence. When I divorced, I was in limbo myself. Blogging just gave me a new direction to focus on and build new relationships. The sky’s the limit from hereon out!
Glad I get to hang with you in BlogTalk. 🙂
Donna
Thanks for the feedback, Donna, that you feel I have gotten over my ‘stiff technical’ writing!!! Coming from you,that means so much! I am so glad too that you found happiness and shelter with your amazing blog during your difficult chapter in life…..YOu are so right: The sky is the limit!!
Okay first I laughed out loud when I saw our Zumba conversation. 😉 Second, Fabulous post Heather. I really feel like I “know you know you” now. I just loved reading your story and journey into blogging. Your projects are just amazing…but you sharing about your family and husband touched my heart. Mine travels a ton as well for the US government, and I know how lonely that can be but yet you are so proud of them for their service to their country. Thank you for sharing your heart and your blog story with us. Hugs!
Heather
Yeah, that conversation we had on Blogtalk, completely busted me up!! Thanks so much for your sweet comments and words!!!!! I have never talked about what I was going through at that time on my blog, and it felt good to just let it go and let it out!! I didn’t know your hubs travelled a lot too….hope you have found a way to deal with the challenge of that! Your blog is so freaking amazing I am sure you get a lot of reward and satisfaction from it, with having a ‘crazy’ lifestlye!! So glad to have met you thru Blogtalk and can’t wait to have more silly convos with ya!!!!!
LOOOOOOVE the post lady! <3 You are also a hero, just as your hubby is! You hold down the fort at home, while he’s protecting our wonderful nation! THANK YOU BOTH FOR YOUR SACRIFICE!
XOXO
Evey
Thanks for the kind sweet words of support Evey! I will pass on your ‘thankyou’ to my hubs….I have to say from both himself and me, that military members and their families really appreciate that, the recognition of the sacrifice that each and every military member and family member make every day! I personally don’t put myself in the category of ‘Hero’, but I appreciate that you think of me that way! All I can suggest is that if you find out that there is a new military family that has moved to your neighbourhood, please say hello to them….they most likely would love to make a new friend at their new posting! Thanks again Evey for stopping by today!
Love the story behind the name of your blog! 🙂
Thanks so much Ginger! Glad you were able to get to know me a bit better! And thank you for dropping by my blog today!
Shout it Out! This girl is the Best ever! Heather you are one of the sweetest ladies I have met- so very happy I can say- I KNOW HER!!! Congrats on this bloglight..so so deserved- I just love ya to pieces!
Jenn!! Wow….thanks for your amazing comments here!!! So glad I met you too, you and your dancing videos rock!! It feels amazing to have come from such a stressful personal situation (how come every time I say that word I think of the show Jersey Shore, haha!) to the place I am now surrounded by all my supportive friends!
Congratulations Heather! This is such a great post to read for a first-time visitor to your blog. How wonderful that your blog beginning had such a purpose for you and filled a need for you. I love that you always set 4 places in the absence of your husband, and I love that you didn’t sit around sulking, but instead started a blog! I also love your table and your setting for Fall, which I hadn’t seen on HS. I’ll be back to visit often. laurie
Thanks Laurie for sending me the sweet supportive comments! My blog certainly did serve like a lifepreserver for me during a rocky time! Glad you were able to get to know me a bit better!! Come back for a visit any time you can!! I am off to your blog to check it out! So glad to make a new friend Laurie!!! Have a fab week 🙂
Heather,
I’m zumba-ing right along with you! After all, us mod podge loving gals gotta stick together. What fun to get to know you a bit better – but I always knew you were a rockstar!
And I am so totally making those tea towels!
Kelly
Glad you got to know me a bit better Kelly! You are a rock star too, wow your blog is amazing and you are one cool chick! Have fun making those tea towels!
OMG I could have written this post! Exactly where and I why I started blogging! It was this pcs move that showed me that my life was just stagnant! I was feeling pretty worthless and trying to figure out where I fit in, in this world! And my husband deployed! Sounds like we live a similar life as well as similar interests and inspiration sources! Congrats for getting noticed on Hometalk! Maybe one day I will get noticed! HA
oh-What did you end up deciding to do with your kitchen?
Wanda, you started blogging for these reasons too? I am so sorry your latest move made you feel like life was getting stagnant! But hopefully being in that crummy ‘position’ has opened up new fun opportunities for you with your amazing blog! Thanks for the congrats!
I am so glad to have found you! What a great blog!
So glad you found me Jenny!!! Looking forward to getting to know you better! Thank you for saying such sweet things about my blog!
Love this post! I just pinned those tea towels and the cup cozy 🙂
I have to say that before I moved to San Diego (a very big military town) six years ago, I knew very few military wives. Now I am surrounded by them and am constantly in awe of how they handle their husbands’ absences with such grace. The story about setting a place at the table for him is so sweet. Thanks for sharing!
-Elena
acasarella.blogspot.com
Thanks for pinning the towels and cup cozy Elena!! Glad you were able to get to know me a bit better! I hope you get to befriend some of the wives around you….we love our friends very fiercely since often we are not near family and our friends become our family!
What a gorgeous post Heather. I don’t think I realized WHY you were “Setting for four”. That completely made me tear up. Once upon a time, Jim was in the Navy and can still remember missing him so desperately when he was gone almost a year. I don’t know how you do it year after year? I am so glad you dipped your toe in the blogging pool! Girl, you’re are posting like an Olympian now 🙂
You’re so sweet Shannon to say that! Once a military wife always a military wife in spirit..and my Dad was in the Navy!!! Such a small world!! It must have been hard for you Shannon; Navy wives do spend a great deal of time on their own when the guys are ‘at sea’….How do I do it year after year??? One foot in front of the other girlfriend!!! And the Army has a saying ‘Put your head down and give’er!!!!’ That’s me! Thanks for passing on that my posts have gotten better….it feels way more ‘natural’ than it did before!
Heather, your explanation of how your blog got it’s name is a total tear-jerker! That is so special. You have really done an excellent job of becoming a wonderful blogger over the past year and a half! Congrats, and I’m so happy to get to know you better in the Bloglight! 🙂
Well, I didn’t mean to make you cry Beth, but I am glad my story touched you….I think there are many of us who have felt squeezed into a painful place by ‘life’ and started blogging to try and find our voice, have some fun and challenge ourselves in a new area! Thank you for saying I have become a ‘wonderful blogger’…I still feel really out to lunch a lot of times but it’s been so much fun! So glad you had the opportunity to get to know me better and I look forward to getting to know YOU better too!
Thanks Laurie for sending me the sweet supportive comments! My blog certainly did serve like a lifepreserver for me during a rocky time! Glad you were able to get to know me a bit better!! Come back for a visit any time you can!!
Beautiful post Heather! What an inspiration you are. We are not military but live in a largely military city and have had to say “goodbye” more than once to wonderful friends. I love learning how others got started and why they chose their names….gave me chills! Thank you for sharing your story!
I am so glad you had the opportunity to meet and befriend some military families….they are the most loyal and dear friends a person can have. Since most of the time we are not close to family, we adopt the friends around us to be our new family! Thank you for reaching out to military families in your community, that’s amazing! And thank you for swinging by my blog to read my story!
You’re fabulous, Heather! I hope all good things for you this year and beyond! I’m so glad to have met you in this amazing thing called blogging!
Gwen, thank you so much for your kind comments here! I wish all good things for you this year too with your new career helping others design and set up their blogs! I am so glad I met you too, you give me inspiration that dreams can come true!
The Internet can definitely be a double edged sword kind of place, but I agree that overall the blogging world is a wonderful way to meet supportive and like-minded folks. I started blogging because with being chronically ill my world was growing smaller and I needed that connection with others. I became an advocate for others like myself, and also made some wonderful friends. Now that I am commenting and participating in the crafting/DIY/Decorating area, I have found everyone to be very welcoming. I am thrilled for you that your blog provided what you needed then, and hopefully will expand to provide you the opportunities you seek in the future.
God bless you and your husband for the sacrifices you make for all of us every single day, it is appreciated more than I can ever express!
Thank you Maureen for your encouraging comments….I hope that your illness improves in the very near future and am so glad that you are now blogging about crafts and decorating! So exciting! Thanks as well for recognizing and appreciating my hubs service, it means so much to us! I hope that the field of medicine continues to advance to find solutions for your illness.
Great post and getting your own domain is easy. I just did it last week. If I can do it anyone can. I started blogging at the start of 2010. Such a fun creative outlet.
Congrats non registering your own domain Kim! I agree, blogging is a fun place to channel our creativity!
I think you have come along way and have some amazing posts to show for it!! Love the pictures you take and I’m game for trying zumba with you anytime– or sitting on the front porch swing– sipping coffee or tequila- which ever! hah.. hugs girl! Glad to have found you along the way! xoxo
Janette you are so sweet to leave such kind compliments! I would love to Zumba with you too!!! Of course I am so, so glad to have found you along the way as well!
Heather,
I loved reading this piece, learning about your start. I guess it is a familiar story for many. While I am not a military wife, I am the daughter and sister to a few very sick people and the last year has been just dreadful. I decided to write to be able to focus on something positive and so far it has been a lovely distraction. My blog is super teeny tiny and I am making tons of rookie mistakes, including linking my general url, instead of a specific post, to linky parties like your own! It is comforting to hear that a polished pro like yourself had a learning curve too! Maybe there’s hope for me yet! 🙂 Have a lovely weekend.
Thanks so much Kim for your lovely comments! I’m so sorry you are going through such a difficult time right now – I’m glad you found a positive focus with blogging! We all start as teeny tiny blogs – you just learn as you go and learn through making mistakes – I made a lot when I first started! There is definitely tons of hope for your blog growing Kim – you will grow – it’s all about trial and error and the more you blog the more you learn! Best of luck Kim and thanks for reaching out!!